Almost here...

Happy Halloween!

So.  We're about to have our first, and from all discussion and conversation leading up to this point, ONLY offspring.  And you're almost here.  I wish I could accurately scribe how that makes both of us feel.

I'm sorry to start off your first blog post so unceremoniously, but I've been putting this off for months, and now you can see why.  It is incredibly difficult to put into words how excited we both are to meet you!  

Here is what I want to say to you, though, no matter how well I am able to articulate it:

• You are loved.  Before you are born, you have been so incredibly loved, and not just by your mother and I.  You have a whole lot of family and friends who also love you very much.
• Your mother and I love each other very much, more than we ever thought we had the capacity for.  You are the by-product of our love, which means we have the same level (if not more) love for you.
• Your mother and I... have strange senses of humor.  Sorry, that's just the way it is.  Our jokes aren't always good, or in good taste, but they are well-intended.  
• I am what is commonly referred to as a 'history buff' in the field of WWII.  Sorry again, you'll have to get used to that, as well.  When you are old enough, watch Saving Private Ryan, and always remember the last few minutes of that film.  "Earn this."  You'll know what that means someday.
• Your first name comes from our mutual love of Christmas.  Some have described us as "Buddy the Elf," when it comes to the holidays.  We're just fine with that.  Hope you are, too.
• Your second name comes from Abigail Adams, former First Lady (First Woman, really) of the United States.  She was a strong, confident, bold, and brave woman.  She is living proof that you are never to be defined by your gender, or any other category for that matter.  Be strong, be confident.
• Be you.  Don't be who someone else wants you to be.  "To thine own self, be true."  Words to live by.

I'm writing this all down for a couple of reasons.  First, I had an illness last year which nearly... well... let me just say I wasn't feel well at all for a very long time, and we were all scared I wasn't going to get better.

Second, and possibly more relevant, life is quirky sometimes.  And by that, I mean it is here and gone in an instant.  You will be born in one second, but how long we live is never known.  Things happen beyond our control, so if anything ever keeps us apart, I wanted to make sure I documented these random thoughts and musings for your eventual consumption.

I am not a great writer, only in my head perhaps, and I am not the world's greatest communicator, though I do swear by communication.  This might be more for my own benefit than yours, but either way, it is all about you.

Our lives are about to be inexorably altered, all three of us.  So long as you never forget that you are loved, and that you have a huge team behind you, you will be fine.  

Don't ever forget that.  Lean on others when you need to.  Nobody ever goes through life alone, at least they don't have to.  We are all tied to one another somehow, whether we see the threads or not.  You are a unique individual, as deserving of love and respect as anyone else.  I mean it; those aren't just pithy words out of a magazine.

Lastly, do not fear the end of the road.  Life is never meant to be lived in order to die.  Life is simply meant to be lived.  (Another cliché) "Life is about the journey, not the destination."  I do strongly believe that.  Enjoy the sights and sounds and smells and experiences along the way.  Try things, use your common sense, but don't be afraid to explore.

You are beautiful.  You are special.  You are strong.  You are amazing.  You are loved, and you have the capacity to love.  Welcome to the world, my little Nightmare Before Christmas*, and enjoy the journey!

* Sorry, forgot to mention, that's Daddy's favorite movie.  Well, one of them anyway.